Lesson Learned
Description
Surviving a Long-Term Affair and Saving a Marriage
Transforming Communication and Parenting in a Troubled Marriage
Healing a Marriage by Confronting Insecurities and Building Trust
Religious Differences and Strengthening Marriage Bonds
The Affection Gap: Bridging Emotional Distance in a Long-Term Marriage
Workplace Dating Detours
When Blind Dates Go Wrong
Comfort Vs. Fulfillment In Modern Dating
Demanding Respect and Openness in a Relationship
Get Outta My Dating Pool
Seeking Clarity and Connection in Dating
Gym Flirting 101
Finding Balance in Love After Loss
As I sat in church on Christmas Eve- I cried. I cried because the Pastor was discussing our Christmas gifts of Mercy and Change. I honestly thought this man was speaking directly to me. I was shaking my head as he told me, “God has given you the gift of change. All good things do not come to an end and you have been given the gift of changing the evil and bad in your life. You have the power to work to change that which you do not like in yourself.” Sure, I know this, but it’s just too hard. Where do I start? It’s going to take so long, it’s going to be so tough and I just don’t think I can do it.
Then he stood there and continued, “It’s not supposed to be easy. If you didn’t work for it, sweat for it, dedicate yourself to it then it will never truly be yours. You will never appreciate it, own it, and be responsible for it.”
Wow, okay. Yeah, I guess I knew that, too. After all, anything worth doing is worth doing right. Nothing that tastes good can be good for you. Anything worth working for is worth working hard for. Those are all saying, right? I suppose they are saying for a reason.
There is also a saying, “God never gives you more than He knows you can handle.” And the familiar snarky response, “I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.” Sometimes I feel like that. Sometimes I resent how much I am given. When I think like that; when I think negatively, I try and sit back and put things into perspective. I say, “This is a big issue for me but what about all those in the world who are much worse off than I am? Would they be complaining if they were in my shoes?” Doubtful is the answer I usually come to.
I have plenty of flaws. The Pastor called me (us) sinners. Well, yeah, of course I am. Those commandments and rules that God set aren’t easy! Everyone sins and nobody is perfect. I’ve come to terms with the mistakes missteps that I have made in life. I have learned not to beat myself up every time I mess up. This wasn’t an easy lesson for me, but at 30 I’m finally learning to forgive myself.
I’m broke…then again who isn’t in today’s economy or around the holidays. I’m not actually broke I just never have as much money as I (or my bills/loans) think I should have. Seems there is always more going out than coming in. I suppose that is the way it works when you have a new car, student loans, health and car insurance, credit card/cell phone/household bills to pay.
I procrastinate. I am impatient. I have a short Irish temper and a Greek ability to hold a grudge. I over think everything. I love fiercely but once crossed it’s nearly impossible to get back in my good graces. I have slept with married men, had impure thoughts, and premarital sex. I’m sarcastic and sometimes inappropriate. I have a filthy mouth and a dirty sense of humor. Let me just say that I don’t consider most of these a bad thing…but some people would.
The one thing that I would really like to change about myself, my one most obvious “flaw” is my weight. I know…how original…a woman who doesn’t like how she looks. Here’s the thing. I do like the way I look. I think I am gorgeous. In all seriousness I like my curves and my “fullness”. I have always struggled with eating and with weight and long ago I think I accepted that it was my fate to be heavy. Well that is just bullshit. I have definitely let myself go past a point that is healthy. I have a family history of high cholesterol, blood pressure issues, diabetes, heart problems…none of which are an issue for me now but that doesn’t mean they can’t swiftly become one.
So not for a vain reason but for health reasons I have realized that my time for procrastination is over. My usual, “I have too much too lose, I’ll never be able to do it.” Attitude has got to go. I can’t do this anymore. I don’t want to do this anymore. I am lazy by nature but I am vowing that I am going to make a change.
It’s not going to be easy; I don’t expect it to be. The pounds aren’t going to come off easy or quickly and knowing that at the start is a blessing. Knowing that I will have bad days, days where I make bad food decisions or half ass a work out and forgiving myself in advance for that is a blessing. Knowing that it is okay to fail now and then but still not lose sight of my goal is the way to go.
I refuse to do a fad diet. They don’t work because they aren’t life long weight loss solutions. If they worked then everyone would be thin (in my opinion). I tried the Atkins diet and lost about 40 pounds…had a weark night of booze and 2 slices of pizza and BAM the weight flew back. No thanks. Plus I’m a miserable bitch without carbs! I refuse to take those weight loss drugs that amp you up until it feels like your heart is about to explode…how is that healthy!? I tried that a couple times and I felt like I was tripping out and for a woman who doesn't do drugs it's not a fun feeling. I am just going to have to learn better portion control and be stricter about my work out schedule.
The hardest part of this entire process is going to be getting Yiayia on board and explaining to get that making my own meals is a must. I can’t eat her fried, oil leaden, butter rich foods anymore. I feel bad when she has a meal waiting and I don’t eat it but it’s just not healthy for me! I prefer grilled, broiled, or marinated food as opposed to fried and breaded. I also prefer my vegetables raw (and therefore full of vitamins) as opposed to her so soft you don’t need to chew them variety (gag!). I know it’s going to hurt her feelings but I have to do what is right for me.
I would like to find a gym or work out partner who can help motivate me. I know that I'm a lazy shit and having somebody on board with this is going to be a must. I am going to sit down and have a discussion with my Aunt also (she is the head of nutrition at a local hospital) and discuss the healthy way to start this process. I already avoid soda, juice, and processed foods (as much as possible when not in control of your dinners) and haven't eaten beef or pork in over 10 years. I eat chicken and turkey sparingly and a lot of baked fish and salads. I know it's less of a food issue and more kick starting my metabolism...which sucks!
So there it is…my crying in church Christmas lesson. That’s what I took away from my Christmas season. A change for me that is healthy, positive, and necessary. I will keep you all posted on progress, as always, and appreciate all the support I know I will get from you. I hope everyone is having a wonderful Wednesday.
Transforming Communication and Parenting in a Troubled Marriage
Healing a Marriage by Confronting Insecurities and Building Trust
Religious Differences and Strengthening Marriage Bonds
The Affection Gap: Bridging Emotional Distance in a Long-Term Marriage
Workplace Dating Detours
When Blind Dates Go Wrong
Comfort Vs. Fulfillment In Modern Dating
Demanding Respect and Openness in a Relationship
Get Outta My Dating Pool
Seeking Clarity and Connection in Dating
Gym Flirting 101
Finding Balance in Love After Loss
As I sat in church on Christmas Eve- I cried. I cried because the Pastor was discussing our Christmas gifts of Mercy and Change. I honestly thought this man was speaking directly to me. I was shaking my head as he told me, “God has given you the gift of change. All good things do not come to an end and you have been given the gift of changing the evil and bad in your life. You have the power to work to change that which you do not like in yourself.” Sure, I know this, but it’s just too hard. Where do I start? It’s going to take so long, it’s going to be so tough and I just don’t think I can do it.
Then he stood there and continued, “It’s not supposed to be easy. If you didn’t work for it, sweat for it, dedicate yourself to it then it will never truly be yours. You will never appreciate it, own it, and be responsible for it.”
Wow, okay. Yeah, I guess I knew that, too. After all, anything worth doing is worth doing right. Nothing that tastes good can be good for you. Anything worth working for is worth working hard for. Those are all saying, right? I suppose they are saying for a reason.
There is also a saying, “God never gives you more than He knows you can handle.” And the familiar snarky response, “I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.” Sometimes I feel like that. Sometimes I resent how much I am given. When I think like that; when I think negatively, I try and sit back and put things into perspective. I say, “This is a big issue for me but what about all those in the world who are much worse off than I am? Would they be complaining if they were in my shoes?” Doubtful is the answer I usually come to.
I have plenty of flaws. The Pastor called me (us) sinners. Well, yeah, of course I am. Those commandments and rules that God set aren’t easy! Everyone sins and nobody is perfect. I’ve come to terms with the mistakes missteps that I have made in life. I have learned not to beat myself up every time I mess up. This wasn’t an easy lesson for me, but at 30 I’m finally learning to forgive myself.
I’m broke…then again who isn’t in today’s economy or around the holidays. I’m not actually broke I just never have as much money as I (or my bills/loans) think I should have. Seems there is always more going out than coming in. I suppose that is the way it works when you have a new car, student loans, health and car insurance, credit card/cell phone/household bills to pay.
I procrastinate. I am impatient. I have a short Irish temper and a Greek ability to hold a grudge. I over think everything. I love fiercely but once crossed it’s nearly impossible to get back in my good graces. I have slept with married men, had impure thoughts, and premarital sex. I’m sarcastic and sometimes inappropriate. I have a filthy mouth and a dirty sense of humor. Let me just say that I don’t consider most of these a bad thing…but some people would.
The one thing that I would really like to change about myself, my one most obvious “flaw” is my weight. I know…how original…a woman who doesn’t like how she looks. Here’s the thing. I do like the way I look. I think I am gorgeous. In all seriousness I like my curves and my “fullness”. I have always struggled with eating and with weight and long ago I think I accepted that it was my fate to be heavy. Well that is just bullshit. I have definitely let myself go past a point that is healthy. I have a family history of high cholesterol, blood pressure issues, diabetes, heart problems…none of which are an issue for me now but that doesn’t mean they can’t swiftly become one.
So not for a vain reason but for health reasons I have realized that my time for procrastination is over. My usual, “I have too much too lose, I’ll never be able to do it.” Attitude has got to go. I can’t do this anymore. I don’t want to do this anymore. I am lazy by nature but I am vowing that I am going to make a change.
It’s not going to be easy; I don’t expect it to be. The pounds aren’t going to come off easy or quickly and knowing that at the start is a blessing. Knowing that I will have bad days, days where I make bad food decisions or half ass a work out and forgiving myself in advance for that is a blessing. Knowing that it is okay to fail now and then but still not lose sight of my goal is the way to go.
I refuse to do a fad diet. They don’t work because they aren’t life long weight loss solutions. If they worked then everyone would be thin (in my opinion). I tried the Atkins diet and lost about 40 pounds…had a weark night of booze and 2 slices of pizza and BAM the weight flew back. No thanks. Plus I’m a miserable bitch without carbs! I refuse to take those weight loss drugs that amp you up until it feels like your heart is about to explode…how is that healthy!? I tried that a couple times and I felt like I was tripping out and for a woman who doesn't do drugs it's not a fun feeling. I am just going to have to learn better portion control and be stricter about my work out schedule.
The hardest part of this entire process is going to be getting Yiayia on board and explaining to get that making my own meals is a must. I can’t eat her fried, oil leaden, butter rich foods anymore. I feel bad when she has a meal waiting and I don’t eat it but it’s just not healthy for me! I prefer grilled, broiled, or marinated food as opposed to fried and breaded. I also prefer my vegetables raw (and therefore full of vitamins) as opposed to her so soft you don’t need to chew them variety (gag!). I know it’s going to hurt her feelings but I have to do what is right for me.
I would like to find a gym or work out partner who can help motivate me. I know that I'm a lazy shit and having somebody on board with this is going to be a must. I am going to sit down and have a discussion with my Aunt also (she is the head of nutrition at a local hospital) and discuss the healthy way to start this process. I already avoid soda, juice, and processed foods (as much as possible when not in control of your dinners) and haven't eaten beef or pork in over 10 years. I eat chicken and turkey sparingly and a lot of baked fish and salads. I know it's less of a food issue and more kick starting my metabolism...which sucks!
So there it is…my crying in church Christmas lesson. That’s what I took away from my Christmas season. A change for me that is healthy, positive, and necessary. I will keep you all posted on progress, as always, and appreciate all the support I know I will get from you. I hope everyone is having a wonderful Wednesday.
Début de l'événement
24.03.2022
Fin de l'événement
24.03.2022